Dear Readers,
FC #84 elicited quite a few anecdotes about the chappal.
Jyotsna Belliappa wrote about the pups chewing up the chappals and how her slippers went on a pilgrimage when she was praying at a temple.
Mrs. Sridevi Sarma gave an excellent narrative of her sojourn to Kerala for a wedding when her footwear gave up on her, and she had to attend a wedding without them.
A P Thomas goes back in time to the 60s when he inherited a pair of blue Hawaii chappals and was itching to show it off to his friends at school but had to devise a way to wear chappals instead of the canvas shoes. This is what he did: “I put up a fake bandage on one foot and went to school, and I was the cynosure of all students who wanted to know from where I got the chappal but no one showed any concern for my ‘injury’!’’
Lakshika says, “Brings back a plethora of memories. Oh! 'those were the days my friend, we thought they'd never end...'. Such a refreshing read, almost cathartic!”
Radhakrishna shares a novel way of avoiding chappal theft. He says: “When it is necessary to leave footwear in a public place, one should keep one footwear in one place and the other in a different place, so the footwear will be safe.” He also referred to ‘Umbrella Morals’ of an Englishman who exchanged his old umbrella for a new one but did not consider it stealing since he had left his old umbrella behind. Perhaps ‘Chappal Morals’ are in the offing?
P A Verghese says chappals also bring back memories of bell-bottoms, HMT watches etc.
Ashvini Ranjan recalls the days when 10 siblings (They could not form a cricket team) had identical blue Hawaii chappals and anyone could wear any pair that was in the pile — it did not matter if one chappal was size 7 and the other was size 8.
🛒 Shopping Complex
If you think I am going to discuss the configuration of a Mall, you will be disappointed.
I will be focusing on the kinds of complex people have with shopping. Some are very selective and seldom buy anything that is not essentially required. Some follow Marie Kondo's rule that if you buy something new, you need to discard the old one. Sounds like “buy one, throw one”.
Some are price-conscious, others are easily persuaded to buy something even if it is not something they need. Still, others require no persuasion but are impulsive or compulsive shoppers. Oniomania means compulsive buying. It may be characterised as a disorder. I am no psychiatrist and claim no special knowledge about this disorder. My narrative on the various aspects of shopping is based on my own experiences, observations and some images too.
Window shopping
It may be called passive shopping and can be equated to ‘temptation leads to sin’. Visualise this scenario. You walk along the market street with your wife, pausing to look at the merchandise showcased in the windows. It all seems pretty harmless until your wife stops at a window and takes an immediate liking to an item on display. She tries to peer closely to locate the price tag. She obviously won’t find one because the shopkeeper wants you to go in to find out the price. So even as you are trying hard to distract her, your wife tells you, “I just want to check the price. Let’s go in. We don’t have to buy.”
So, you walk in, and the shopkeeper does not tell you the price; instead, he says “don’t worry about the price, Madam. You have such good taste. Have a look at the item on display and also its many variations.” So, your wife is offered a seat and maybe a soft drink too, and the items are put before her. Sensing her heightened interest, the shopkeeper casually says that it is the fifth anniversary of his shop, and he is giving an unbelievable 20% discount.
You can make out that the guy is making up the anniversary story. You make an attempt to distract the wife and escort her out of the shop. But the wife is now interested in the discount, and she selects one of the items and says, “I like it but will consider buying it only if you give me another 20% discount as today is our wedding anniversary, and I'm out shopping with my husband”. From the look on your face, the shopkeeper knows that it is not your anniversary but is pleased to have got the wife into buying mode.
He tells her conspiratorially, “I will give you a 30% discount, but please don’t tell anyone. It is a special anniversary discount only for you.” Realising that your wife is not getting her 40% discount, you seize the opportunity to abort the sale. So, you tell your wife, “Come on darling, if he is not giving you a 40% discount, we should be going.” Bingo! The shopkeeper with a poker face starts packing the item and tells the wife, “Saab is getting upset. I don’t want to displease him. I am giving you a 40% discount.” He averts his head to avoid your glare as he is handing back the credit card. Deal done, you come out of the shop and your wife snuggles up and says, “You are such a good bargainer. But for you, I would not have got a 40% discount.” You grunt. The cat has got your tongue!
While on the subject of window shopping, here’s a joke for you:
Customer: May I try on that dress in the window, please?
Salesperson: No, ma’am. You’ll have to use the fitting room like everyone else.
Vacation shopping
You are on vacation either in Dubai or somewhere else with your wife and kids. The wife has a list of things recommended by her friends who have been to Dubai for shopping. When you ask her if they are really needed, the wife says, “What are you saying? Do you want me to go empty-handed? What will I show my friends at the kitty party when they ask me what I bought?” So, she goes on a shopping spree. As you walk towards the exit you spot an iPhone shop and are curious to look at the latest model, but you are stopped in your tracks by your wife who says “Nothing wrong with the phone you bought last year. We don’t have to spend on these gadgets. Remember, we have to go to the Gold Souk in the evening.” As you walk behind her like a sheep, your son rubs it in by humming under his breath, Mary had a little lamb.
A vacation also means souvenirs. They range from t-shirts to little magnetic mementoes to stick on your fridge. You dread the compulsory walk through the gift shop at the end of a tour, whether it be a museum or any other place. You try to walk past the display quickly, but your wife is nowhere in sight. You backtrack and find her looking at little items and trinkets, and they are priced at $5. She picks up a dozen of them to give away as mementoes to the kitty party members and to the neighbours who undertook to water the plants. As if to avenge, you pick up a souvenir t-shirt, priced at $30. The wife snatches it from your hand and says, “Are you colour blind or what, you will look like a clown in it. Don’t waste money. Put it back.” Your wife hands the trinkets, and you head to the cash counter. The PYT at the counter smiles at you and says, “You have an eye for good things. Nice buy.” You smile at her and when you go back to where the wife is standing, and she says mockingly, “Sure, you have an eye for good things.” You decide not to dispute what she said but to heed the advice of The Bard: “The better part of valour is discretion,” from Henry VI. (The modern version is ‘discretion is the better part of valour’). After all, you want things to be peaceful when you go shopping for a single malt in the duty-free shop on arrival.
Threshold shopping
I have been a victim of this and am sure some of you have as well. I went to this ready-made garment shop to buy a few shirts and at the cash counter, the smart-looking lady entered all the items and the total came to Rs.4400. She smiled at me and said, “Sir buy something for another Rs.600 because on purchase of Rs.5000 or more you get a discount voucher of Rs.500 which you can use on your future purchases in any of our outlets.” I did some maths (I barely passed that subject in high school) and concluded that by spending Rs.600 I will be getting back Rs.500, and so I walked around for another half hour trying to find something that was just about Rs.600+. The only thing I could find for that amount was four pairs of socks. Anyway, I completed the purchase and when I came home I told my wife about the gift voucher, and she said, “This is their way of making you go back and spend more money. Please check the expiry date.” I noticed that the voucher was valid for three months, but the next line made me do a double-take. It was written in fine print, that the discount voucher can be used on your next purchases worth Rs.5,000/-. As it is, my wife has discounted me as an impulsive buyer, and I have no intention of letting her know of this fine print.
Buy One, Get One and other such variants are also meant for guys like me. So, to avoid getting tricked into such deals, I go shopping these days with my wife. She knows how to ward off an over-enthu salesperson.
Debit Card & Credit Card Shopping
My wife is a die-hard debit card user. She hates being in debt and prefers debt with an ‘i’ in it. I am a credit card fan. According to her, debit cards bring with them a certain discipline and discretion when it comes to shopping. When she swipes the card, the bank tells her how much she has spent and how much money is left in her account. That, according to her, is very reassuring. She has consistently refused to get a credit card. Even the add-on card that I offered was rejected, saying “I prefer not to live on credit extended by you on your extended credit.”
On the day when the credit card bill comes, my wife extols the virtue of spending within one's means. For her, the debit card is like ‘Veni Vidi Vici’ (I came, I saw, I conquered) and the credit card is like ‘Veni, Vidi, Visa’ (I came, I saw, and I was conquered).
There are many more versions of shopping:
Boredom shopping
Online shopping
Discount shopping
Competitive shopping
Persuasive shopping
Impulsive shopping
Compulsive shopping
I have to stop here for want of space. But you are welcome to share your experiences with shopping, and to preserve anonymity you may say it in the third person.
Take care and wear a mask when you go shopping for Valentine's Day.
Thanks Shishir. We should meet.
Excellent writing 😀😀😀
Enjoyed throughly enjoyed the filter coffee after a long time I had a hearty laugh 😀👍