Bengaluru
FC 233 was perhaps not provocative enough to elicit insightful comments. So, let me get on with this week’s post.
🧑🤝👩People in Our Life
If you can return in time, you may remember people whose paths crossed yours, but you cannot anticipate or imagine the kind of people whose path may intersect yours, in times to come. So, when you think of people in your life you are, for the most part, thinking of people who crossed your path in the past. Of course, you can think of people who are with you in the present but they may not necessarily be the object of your discussion. The past is easy to recall and dissect.
My daughter sent me this Anon quote”
“There is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some people will test you, some will use you, some will bring out the best in you, but everyone will teach you something about yourself. Both positive and negative relationships teach you valuable lessons. This is an incredible step toward expanding your consciousness. The road to self-discovery requires help from others. As humans, we are always seeking feedback and approval from others. That is how we learn and become better as individuals. No relationship is a waste of time. The wrong ones teach you the lessons that prepare you for the right ones. Appreciate everyone who enters your life because they contribute to your growth and happiness.”
More than three years back, I wrote about ‘Women in Our Life’. If you wish to read it, please use this link 🔗https://mrprasanna.substack.com/i/33678697/the-women-in-our-lives. This time, I will be speaking more generally.
Life is like a path in the jungle. You can only see so much and you are unable to imagine what is in store until the next turn is before you. Just as how in a jungle you come across a variety of flora and fauna, so will you come across people from different walks of life. Some are in your vision for a fleeting moment and some leave lingering impressions on you. Your capacity to observe determines the extent or nature of that impression. An anecdote to illustrate the point:
As they were driving by, the husband thought he saw a lady celebrity and asked his wife if she saw the lady in the car that passed by. She answers “You mean the lady who had many rings on her fingers, a nice necklace and diamond earrings? No, I didn’t see her properly to know who she was.”
As we walk down the many paths of our lives, we meet several people who impact our lives in more ways than we can fully comprehend. We begin to wonder: Why did our paths cross? What is the significance of these people? We don’t realise that similar thoughts might be on the mind of the person whose path we crossed. It could be a fleeting encounter with a stranger or a lifelong friendship. The longer the encounter, the greater would be the influence of that person on us.
Culturally, we Indians tend to differentiate between persons who cross our paths. If we see a person about to cross our path we may deviate from that path if that person has left a bad impression on us. On the other hand, if a person whom we haven’t met for a long time crosses our path, we are sure to extend that meeting over coffee and pledge to stay connected.
Chance encounters can be either good or bad. You are in Italy looking for someone to ask for directions and the person whom you approach turns out to be more than helpful. He walks with you some distance to show you the way as he thinks his English isn’t perfect enough to give you directions. Imagine the same situation and you meet a guy who is curt and abrupt and rattles out something in Italian and walks away. You connect the dots and tell yourself that the guy was much ruder than your neighbour, whose path you have to cross every day.
There are serendipitous encounters. Unforeseen and unintended. Imagine you are travelling on a train and some time later a person comes and sits across you and engages you in small talk. Before long, you find yourself telling him that you are looking for a job and he gives you the reference of someone who might be looking for a person like you. When you land the job you thank your stars for the serendipitous crossing of paths and you may develop the instinct to help others. What is important is that such encounters remind us that there is purpose and meaning behind every connection we make.
Divine intervention is an oft-heard phrase. The Bible has many such examples as are the Shastras and Puranas. Talking of the parting of the Red Sea the Bible says “God delivered the Israelites from Pharaoh by parting the Red Sea, creating a dry path to escape.” This story exemplifies divine intervention, where God’s power works miraculously in an impossible situation. Similarly, Lord Krishna’s divine intervention in the Mahabharata War is a central theme in Hindu mythology and is depicted in various episodes throughout the epic.
In today’s time, divine intervention is better known by the phrase ‘God sent’. Any person who comes into your life most unexpectedly to extricate you from a fix, is seen as God-sent or ‘God in human form’ which is fortified by the saying ‘Kaliyuge, Daivam manushya roopena’, meaning: In Kaliyug, God takes the human form.
An extension of divine intervention is a ‘blessing in disguise’. You have a disagreement with your boss as a result of which you quit and join another company where you go up the ladder faster than you imagined.
Or a disagreement makes you resign impulsively with no job in sight and curse your fate but not your indiscretion. Bosses are the best example of the statement “Some people will test you, some will use you, some will bring out the best in you”.
“Both positive and negative relationships teach you valuable lessons.” It seems ironic that we should learn valuable lessons from negative relationships. We have heard someone saying
“I learnt a bitter lesson”. What’s valuable about a bitter lesson? Well, the experience may have left a bad taste but it teaches us to be wary and circumspect before engaging with someone.
A blind belief and a blind bid are alike in their outcome. You either benefit from it or suffer. We have to remember that “No relationship is a waste of time. The wrong ones teach you the lessons that prepare you for the right ones.”
The statement “Appreciate everyone who enters your life because they contribute to your growth and happiness.” seems a bit contradictory given that some of them may make you unhappy by their conduct. But a deep dive into the statement may help realise that even a person whose negativity has been a source of irritation or unhappiness could help you to either steer clear of such characters or develop a thick skin about their annoying conduct.
We don’t choose our parents but they are persons who brought us to life and are part of our life.
Yet, the relationship may take a different turn as we grow up, for better or worse. We can choose friends but not enemies. You make enemies, not choose them — though you can introspect as to why that enmity manifested. You learn from friends and enemies alike if you are discerning enough. Fairweather friends are an example of people who help you realise that you are gullible. You learn the hard way and you may find yourself saying “If I have such friends, I don’t need enemies”.
In a lighter vein:
They had crossed paths numerous times over 20 years and never spoken a word. One day, one farmer stops and says to the other “My pig’s sick. Covered in red blotches and really looking ill.” The other one says “One of my pigs had the exact same thing. I gave her turpentine.” The next day they met again and the first one said “I gave my pig turpentine like you said but she died.” The other one, without looking up, says “Yup, so did mine.”
Today, my friend warned a pedestrian about a pothole. I guess that makes him a ‘trip advisor.’
During a discourse, a follower asked Osho, “Guruji, do you believe in superstitions like if a black cat crosses your path you should not proceed further?” Osho replied with his trademark wit and wisdom, “It depends on whether you are a man or a mouse”.
All my readers are ‘persons in my life’. I have learnt from their comments and their feedback. Their patronage has kept me enthused. I hope to be able to sustain the momentum with their support, at least until FC 250. Take care, dear readers, be safe and be aware of the persons who cross your path and persons in your life. Until next week, Ciao!
This resonates so much with me. So many little and seemingly inconsequential interactions have taught me valuable lessons. An elderly lady was trying to put up her carry on case, with some difficulty. I asked if she needed help. “I am fine, I should be, for I packed that heavy bag myself” she said. Everytime I pack my bags, I remember that, and make sure I carry what I can lift and haul. People that come into our lives are precious, indeed!
Wonderful and thought provoking note. As I read it, so many names and faces came back to life in my mind. Big thank you to Prasanna!