Filter Coffee #239

On International Women’s Day

Bengaluru

A few of my readers, without procrastinating, sent in their comments.

• My good friend Jameel makes a tongue-in-cheek comment: “Procrastination is a very good strategy because you have nothing to do today and always have something to do tomorrow.“

  Cheers!

• Viswanathan says: “The world often perceives procrastinators in a paradoxical light. Those who delay tasks, only to scramble at the last moment using jugaad tactics, are often celebrated as ’street-smart’ or ’go-getters’. Meanwhile, individuals who plan and execute tasks efficiently—without the drama of last-minute rush—often go unrecognized simply because their work lacks the visible chaos that draws attention.”

• Tarun Kunzru says: ”Postponing or delaying things on account of lethargy is inefficient and can come back to bite you. But using ’time’ strategically is wise. Timing and prioritizing is critical in getting the best impact and outcomes. Buying time, for example, is a great ploy in negotiations either to put pressure or gain more clarity. I have known cowboys who ’shoot and then aim’ and the classic idealists who keep ’aiming for ever’. ’Movers and shakers’ almost always have a great sense of timing!!“

• S G Murali says: “Constructive Procrastination – Former PM Shri PVN was an expert in not rushing to a decision. His opponents used to say he is procrastinating. But he used to say, ’not taking a decision itself is a decision’ On a lighter note, if the boss procrastinates, he will say, ‘I am exploring all options before taking a strategic decision.’ As usual, nice write up Pras.”

👩‍🦰 International Women’s Day

On 8 March 2025, the world celebrated International Women’s Day under the theme:

“For ALL women and girls: Rights. Equality. Empowerment.”

I am a die-hard feminist and do everything in my power to promote the well-being of women and kids. The best place one can start doing this is to respect women and their space. I may mention here the services rendered by the housekeeping women staff, the maids who work to make ends meet, the caregivers who tend to the sick & disabled. I believe it is important to respect them, acknowledge their services and recognise the dignity of their labour.

There are some, I hope not many, who treat the female staff with an attitude of disdain. With increased awareness, the tolerance for such treatment is not just on the decline but the tables are turned in many cases where there is over dependency on the staff and the woman of the house has to make some effort to keep the househelp in good humour! Like I said once before, the lady of the house will be calm only if the ‘calm-wali’ (Hindi for househelp) turns up to do the chores every day.

This edition is dedicated to women in honour of International Women’s Day, which was celebrated on the 8th of March. It would be appropriate to go back in time and trace the origin of this celebration.

1908: Oppression and inequality were spurring women to become more vocal and active in campaigning for change. Then in 1908, 15,000 women marched through New York City demanding shorter hours, better pay and voting rights.

1909: The first National Woman's Day was observed across the United States on February 28. It was celebrated on the last Sunday of February until 1913. March 8 was then chosen as it marks the day when women in Soviet Russia started protests for the right to vote, which they were granted in 1917.

1975: International Women's Day was celebrated for the first time by the United Nations. In December 1977, the General Assembly adopted a resolution proclaiming a United Nations Day for Women’s Rights and International Peace to be observed on any day of the year by Member States, under their historical and national traditions.

India chose to celebrate National Women’s Day every year on 13th February, the date of birth of Sarojini Naidu.

2011: Saw the centenary of International Women's Day — with the first IWD event held exactly 100 years ago in 1911. President Barack Obama proclaimed March 2011 to be ’Women's History Month’, calling Americans to mark IWD by reflecting on ’the extraordinary accomplishments of women’ in shaping the country's history.

A challenged world is an alert world. Individually, we're all responsible for our thoughts and actions — all day, every day. We can all choose to challenge and call out gender bias and inequality. We can all choose to seek out and celebrate women's achievements. Collectively, we can all help create an inclusive world. From challenge comes change, so let's all choose to challenge.

All men and women have in their life certain women who have shaped their future. Women have played an important role in making us aware of worldly matters and realities. They have taught us the ways of life and human interaction. Such women have been synonymous with a ‘finishing school’.

I am sure all of us, men and women alike, have experienced the influence of women in our lives. Starting with the famous adage, “God could not be with everyone and so he created mothers”, we can look back and realise how much of our character, behaviour and destiny have been moulded by our mothers and the other women in our lives.

On the 4th of March was my mother’s anniversary. She was like a banyan tree, providing shelter and succour to not just the large family under her care but many others who sought that tree like the migrant birds.

In a big joint family in Mysuru (I was too young to count beyond twenty) with so many elders and kids living together, there was an unwritten rule about shared responsibilities. My mother (aka the Home Minister) would be in control of the domestic affairs, the finances, the kitchen and even ‘external family matters’. She was not given to fussing over the children. For her, strength of character came from resilience. Even if we went to her complaining about an ache or hurt, she would say “go pour some cold water on it” or if it was an open wound she would say “apply some turmeric, it will be alright.” Toddlers were encouraged to eat by themselves, and she would say it is good for immunity if the child ate not what is on the plate but what is around it on the ground.

She delivered babies in the house and helped other households with their deliveries as well. ‘Home delivery’ was the norm then. She knew several kinds of native medicines. My mother cured scorpion bites. She would take a bunch of broomsticks and uttering some mantra, she would gently stroke the bitten part for a few minutes and ask the victim to shake the limb vigorously. She would then give him or her a glass of buttermilk and then something to apply. The victim would walk out relieved. Do not know how it worked. Maybe faith healing or hypnosis. People would knock on our doors even in the middle of the night. She would get up without a murmur and attend to them. What more, she never accepted money or anything in return. She did not discriminate but treated anyone who believed in her ability to cure.

My mother did not countenance men or boys of the house being treated any different from the women and the girls. Way back in the 60s she had realised that gender equality is all about men and women performing each other’s tasks without inhibition. I remember washing the cows, clothes, cooking utensils, sweeping and scrubbing, pounding grain, grinding flour with the traditional two-stone grinder with a handle as the grain was fed into the hole at the centre.

Everyone was welcome to rest in her shadow and eat whatever frugal meal she could offer. She embodied the spirit and empowerment of women in the bygone era when women were considered weak and were subjected to male domination. She lived life on her terms and lived fiercely independent until the age of 93 when she passed away. I’m sure many of my readers’ mothers symbolised unshakable resolve, strength and love.

Many women shaped my character and helped me acquire social skills and etiquette. My mother-in-law, my sisters, my aunts and my wife. It was a case of continuous learning and evolving. Women make ordinary men morph into good men and make good men better.

Some light-hearted fun facts about women:

• Why do women never get lost on the way? They ask for directions, unlike…..

• Why do women never play hide & seek with their feelings? Because they don’t trust men to sense them.

• Why are women like Coffee? Because both are strong and wake men up to reality.

I applaud and salute all my women readers and all the women who have been a great influence on my male readers. Let us celebrate the women in our lives.

See you next week! Take care and be safe, ciao!