In Transit At Bangkok
FC 241 resonated with the readers. A few comments came in.
One of the regulars, Lakshmi Raman, says: “As always, I enjoyed reading your post, starting with Jiggs. It brought back the comic to mind, after many decades, and each strip ending with Maggie giving him a whack saying, 'You insect!' I was also reminded of the 90s when I got my first desktop computer and did not know how to use email. Then, on a trip to Chennai to visit my mother, I learnt to do so from a computer shop in the basement of the apartment building, from a 22-year-old teacher who zipped from step to step effortlessly. 'Please go back again, and explain to me slowly' I'd say. He just did not know the meaning of the word slow! Now it's my grandson, 13 years old, who uses the correct word when we do the NYT Spelling Bee or explains how to do all the bells and whistles on WhatsApp. Ah! Youth and age, the bridge between the two is digital.”
Manjunath: “I have looked forward to reading the comic strip 'Bringin up Father' and enjoyed it from my younger days when my newspaper reading was limited to the 'Citizen', 'Blondie', and 'Bringing up Father', apart from the sports page. This issue of Filter Coffee transported me to the '60s and '70s faster than any time machine likely to be invented.”
Subahu Desai: “Jiggs brought back fond and hilarious memories. Having become grandparents recently, my wife and I identify with what you have said.”
Vikesh Walia: “Bringing Up Father has been a great read every Sunday in The Sunday Standard since childhood. Thanks,Prasanna, for taking me back over 50 years and making me nostalgic about my good old weekly Sunday newspaper. I love your Filter Coffee!”
Amar says: “Good one, Prasanna. I guess life moves on, and adapting to change is not an option. Regarding teaching parents and kids, there is a nice song, ‘Teach Your Children Well’ by Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young. Readers may like it.”
🤔 Drop a Brick
I am reminded of a humorous scene in a Kannada drama. A rather dim-witted but affluent fellow, Gundanna lends his coat to his close friend who wants to look sharp and appear well-dressed when he goes to see a girl, a potential match. Gundanna agrees to lend the coat only if he is also taken along. Left with no choice, they take him along but caution him not to say a word about the coat. On arriving at the girl's house, the pleasantries are exchanged, and tea and snacks are offered. Gundanna, true to his name, is rotund and loves to snack. Finding them delectable, he asks the girl’s father if the girl prepared the snacks. This makes the father squirm, and as a diversion, the father asks Gundanna, “How you are related to the boy, Sir?” Feeling quite important, Gundanna rattles off: “He is my dear friend, Sir. Like a brother. The pants, shirt, and shoes are his, but don’t ask me about the coat. I have been asked to not say a word about it.”
The phrase to drop a brick means to commit a blunder unwittingly or to make a tactless or an indiscreet remark or a faux pas. The origin of this phrase, which is akin to an idiom, is not known, but it is believed to have been in usage since the 20th century. It is supposed to have been influenced by the game of dominoes, where players create a chain using bricks, and if a player drops a brick at an inappropriate time, the chain breaks and the game is lost. This can be applied metaphorically to situations where someone says or does something that causes embarrassment or awkwardness. One can avoid dropping a brick if one thinks before speaking. Like the saying goes, engage brain in gear before motor of mouth runs’. Easier said than done.
Metaphorically, the brick represents something that should remain under wraps forever or until it is ok to mention. Imagine you are invited to a party by X, and you have been told to keep it to yourself as a few others who are also close have not been invited due to logistical issues. A few days later, you are talking to one such ‘excluded party,’ and in the course of the conversation, you ask if X would like dark chocolates as a hostess gift and ouch! The brick drops.
The husband plans a surprise birthday party for his wife, invites people who are very dear to her, and plans everything meticulously, keeping everything under wraps. He gives the caterer the menu, which includes items that the wife is very fond of. A day before the party, the phone rings, and the wife picks it up. It is the caterer checking if he should set up a live dosa counter for the party!
Most people don’t wish to discuss their medical issues, and a few confide in someone very close to them. Imagine the confidant unwittingly mentioning that she is getting a medicine her friend needs from the US. When prodded, she would say in a conspiratorial tone, “Don’t say I mentioned, but she needs the drug for a condition that is not very clear to me.” So, she dropped two bricks at once. Agree, readers?
A person can drop a brick by being blunt. Tact and diplomacy, which are antidotes to a brick, are strange concepts for them. How many of us can tolerate someone who makes it a virtue to say or express something in a very direct way that may upset others? The ‘blunt’ guys have no qualms about calling a spade a spade. Interestingly, blunt guys do not volunteer a blunt statement but usually give it to you when you ask for it. So, should you be asking for a blunt answer? If so, be prepared to ‘bear the blunt’. Bluntness also plays out when you seek an opinion or ‘fish for compliments’. Imagine you are in the school watching your daughter perform, and you turn to Mr.Blunt and ask, ‘Did you like my daughter’s performance?’. Patt, comes the reply “It could have been better.”
One could drop a brick by simply assuming a fact. Like the person I know of, visited someone’s house. The daughter of the house had been married for some time and had become rather heavy from the time this person saw her. So, this person assumed that she was in the family way and blurted out, “So, how many months? When is it due?”. I leave it to the readers to imagine the expression on the person’s and the girl’s face. I cannot disclose the name of that person as that would be another brick!
A convenient lie of the past can be an inconvenient brick-drop later. All of us, at some point or the other, find excuses for not attending an event. Take, for instance, one is invited to a wedding in a far away resort at the outer perimeter of Bengaluru. One would shudder at the thought of commuting in the traffic, and one invents an excuse of ‘guests at home’. Some weeks later, during a conversation with the wedding host, this person once again apologises, citing the ‘guest’ issue, and her little daughter lets the cat out by saying, “No Mummy, that’s the day we went to a movie with Dad.” The wedding host does a rescue act and says “No worries, I have been there myself” and makes a mental note to return the favour when the person’s daughter gets married!
Talking to a group or making a speech both involve an alert mind that stays focused on the core of the communication and not digress or be tempted to make off the cuff remarks. A remark unwittingly made can become media fodder. Reminds you of what Abraham Lincoln said:
"When I get ready to talk to people, I spend two-thirds of the time thinking what they want to hear and one third thinking about what I want to say."
These are days of heightened sensitivities, which are getting hypersensitive. One has to be careful with what one says while in a group. Making an insensitive comment would be like not just dropping a brick but dropping it on your toes. Gone are the days when you could jovially tell someone that he has put on weight or he has gone bald. Today, it would be characterised as body shaming. You could lose a friend by a loose comment. I can say with some conviction that if you made such personal remarks about a lady, you could be accused not only of body shaming but also of sexual harassment. Tonne of bricks!
There is something known as ‘dropping a brick on oneself. ’ If someone drops a brick about themselves, it might be seen as endearing or charmingly self-deprecating. Like, someone admitting to having gone to the wrong wedding or calling someone by 8psome other name. One could drop a brick, and it may, metaphorically, land on their foot, causing embarrassment and, in some cases, being accused of breaching the trust reposed. ‘To drop a clanger’ is the British phrase for making a tactless remark orcausinganabsurdor embarrassingblunder.‘Clang’means a loud resonating, ringing sound, but tbh coined noun ‘clanger’, which underscores the conspicuous nature of the mistake, can be found only in this phrase and not elsewhere.
Dear readers, I will be in transit as this post hits your inbox. I hope you liked it. Do write in your comments and your experiences with the ‘brick’. I haven’t seen any pun on‘ dropping a brick. ’ Obviously, it is not funny! Take care, and be safe. See you next week. Ciao!
But life will be without spice of nobody ever dropped a brick.
Super interesting read, thank you!!