Your edition No. 32 on grand parents made delightful reading. You may or may not have realised that your sharing of your experience of travelling in Mumbai suburban trains and grand parents was a perfect fit. I believe to be good and happy grand parents calls for greater skills in balancing than the commuter between Borivilli to Malad. A physical injury can always be fixed in sometime but the latter can be a life long disability. Having said that, one can always avoid a Bagban situation if one is governed by the mind and not by the heart.
Grandparenting is as old as procreation. There may not be enough paper in the world to write all the stories of each grandparent. But what emerges with time and experience are certain trends based on which certain rules emerge. They are called Golden Rules and they are as old as the hills as the proverbs listed below show. If one were to be wise to follow them, I believe the time as grandparents can be useful, relevant and can be truly be the golden years of one’s life. Easily said than done. Dilute the purity of gold and you are in for a hard times.
Thanks to internet and mobile phones. My wife and I get to speak to our grandchildren fairly often. They call after their online classes. We are prepared for the call with either a story, a riddle, a joke or anything that will interest them. A conversation without content can end soon. It takes an effort and planning to keep the discussion alive. Notes are kept handy for an anytime call. Today being Sunday, I had planned to talk about proverbs with my three grand children aged seven to twelve. After reading FC 32, I glanced at the proverbs I had on hand and I thought the answer to being most likeable grandparents was all there.
1. Absence makes a heart go fonder
2. An idle mind is a devil’s workshop
3. Speak when you are spoken to
4. An ounce of protection is worth a pound of cure
5. Every cloud has a silver lining
6. Familiarity breeds contempt
7. It is better to be safe than sorry
8. Keep your mouth shut and eyes open
9. Laughter is the best medicine
10. No gain without pain
If one were to dwell on each, answers to every situation lies therein. Including being most loved grandparents. And finally, the one I liked best is ‘Every man is the architect of his destiny’.
A marvellous piece on " Grandparents" You have dealt with the subject so beautifully that it brought to the surface a lot of my hidden emotions!
Before marriage, the best part of my life ( in hind sight!) was spent with my grandmother's joint family!
As a grandmother, my expectations were many, but in reality my dreams have not come true! I have no regrets as 15 years were spent very happily as a teacher to small children.
God has truly compensated for all the shortcomings with a a very warm and giving husband because of whom, both of us are enjoying life to the hilt , in an independent living setup!! I truly believe in the " here and now"❤️
Reading about your balancing act as a so called “career grandparent”, I have always wondered at your commitment to the task of unfailingly bringing out the issue of FC without fail that my Sunday morning would not be the same without it anymore.
Yes I have had my share of time in Mumbai and I agree on all that you talk about life on the local train, even going to the extent of recommending it as an experience of a lifetime. But a few days travel is not enough, you will need to do it every day for months together to learn something from it. I remember when I started my career in Mumbai, I used to travel on fast trains from Andheri. I remember of what was then (around 1979) popularly called as the “Bada fast”- a train from Virat to Churchgate that wouldn’t even stop at Andheri where even fast trains normally would. I still vividly remember a dare devil passenger on top of one of those Bada fast trains standing against the rushing wind and ducking now and then to avoid the overhead electric lines and bridges on the way.
Speaking of Grandparents, I too was born a bit too late that I was not fortunate to know the love of my grandfather’s- maternal and paternal but I do have fond memories of my grandmother on both sides. But today me and my wife are my grandparents ourselves and my son is fortunate to have had known the love of all four of his grandparents.
Yes, the story of the grandparent spoiling the grand child is indeed true and I am thrilled to see it being played out in our home every day as my wife dots on her two grandchildren so much that the two of them love her much more than anyone else in this world. Such a pleasure to see them playing with her.
Yes, when my son was in the US, my wife and I were visiting grandparents every year and so was my son’s mother-in-law. We strongly feel that one of our greatest benefit that we have had in their coming back, to India for good, is the closeness that we could develop with our grandchildren that once a year visits could never fill and, considering the life in US, we would be relegated to the status (in their minds) of one of their old ancestors of the past that could soon be forgotten.
My mother (son’s grandmother) is fiercely independent and she has chosen to live at her own at her place in Kerala even at her advanced age. We have often talked to her of moving in with us. She always used to quote a popular Mallu saying that loosely translated would mean “There’s nothing like reading from the same Ramayana text at your own home”. But we are aware that this can’t go for long and while thanking God for His blessings, we are planning out things so that she will have someone at her side soon enough.
I grew up with grandparents who were like my parents. They instilled values. And as you said grandparents stepped in when my son was around. I was lucky. I hope I can support my son when I become a grandparent.
I grew up with grandparents who were like my parents. They instilled values. And as you said grandparents stepped in when my son was around. I was lucky. I hope I can support my son when I become a grandparent.
Dear Pras,
Your edition No. 32 on grand parents made delightful reading. You may or may not have realised that your sharing of your experience of travelling in Mumbai suburban trains and grand parents was a perfect fit. I believe to be good and happy grand parents calls for greater skills in balancing than the commuter between Borivilli to Malad. A physical injury can always be fixed in sometime but the latter can be a life long disability. Having said that, one can always avoid a Bagban situation if one is governed by the mind and not by the heart.
Grandparenting is as old as procreation. There may not be enough paper in the world to write all the stories of each grandparent. But what emerges with time and experience are certain trends based on which certain rules emerge. They are called Golden Rules and they are as old as the hills as the proverbs listed below show. If one were to be wise to follow them, I believe the time as grandparents can be useful, relevant and can be truly be the golden years of one’s life. Easily said than done. Dilute the purity of gold and you are in for a hard times.
Thanks to internet and mobile phones. My wife and I get to speak to our grandchildren fairly often. They call after their online classes. We are prepared for the call with either a story, a riddle, a joke or anything that will interest them. A conversation without content can end soon. It takes an effort and planning to keep the discussion alive. Notes are kept handy for an anytime call. Today being Sunday, I had planned to talk about proverbs with my three grand children aged seven to twelve. After reading FC 32, I glanced at the proverbs I had on hand and I thought the answer to being most likeable grandparents was all there.
1. Absence makes a heart go fonder
2. An idle mind is a devil’s workshop
3. Speak when you are spoken to
4. An ounce of protection is worth a pound of cure
5. Every cloud has a silver lining
6. Familiarity breeds contempt
7. It is better to be safe than sorry
8. Keep your mouth shut and eyes open
9. Laughter is the best medicine
10. No gain without pain
If one were to dwell on each, answers to every situation lies therein. Including being most loved grandparents. And finally, the one I liked best is ‘Every man is the architect of his destiny’.
Happy birthday to Rhea. God bless her.
Wow! What an excellent narrative. It is like a supplement to my newsletter. Thank you for taking time out to share your thoughts.
A marvellous piece on " Grandparents" You have dealt with the subject so beautifully that it brought to the surface a lot of my hidden emotions!
Before marriage, the best part of my life ( in hind sight!) was spent with my grandmother's joint family!
As a grandmother, my expectations were many, but in reality my dreams have not come true! I have no regrets as 15 years were spent very happily as a teacher to small children.
God has truly compensated for all the shortcomings with a a very warm and giving husband because of whom, both of us are enjoying life to the hilt , in an independent living setup!! I truly believe in the " here and now"❤️
Thank you Krupa for those lovely words. Very touching.
Reading about your balancing act as a so called “career grandparent”, I have always wondered at your commitment to the task of unfailingly bringing out the issue of FC without fail that my Sunday morning would not be the same without it anymore.
Yes I have had my share of time in Mumbai and I agree on all that you talk about life on the local train, even going to the extent of recommending it as an experience of a lifetime. But a few days travel is not enough, you will need to do it every day for months together to learn something from it. I remember when I started my career in Mumbai, I used to travel on fast trains from Andheri. I remember of what was then (around 1979) popularly called as the “Bada fast”- a train from Virat to Churchgate that wouldn’t even stop at Andheri where even fast trains normally would. I still vividly remember a dare devil passenger on top of one of those Bada fast trains standing against the rushing wind and ducking now and then to avoid the overhead electric lines and bridges on the way.
Speaking of Grandparents, I too was born a bit too late that I was not fortunate to know the love of my grandfather’s- maternal and paternal but I do have fond memories of my grandmother on both sides. But today me and my wife are my grandparents ourselves and my son is fortunate to have had known the love of all four of his grandparents.
Yes, the story of the grandparent spoiling the grand child is indeed true and I am thrilled to see it being played out in our home every day as my wife dots on her two grandchildren so much that the two of them love her much more than anyone else in this world. Such a pleasure to see them playing with her.
Yes, when my son was in the US, my wife and I were visiting grandparents every year and so was my son’s mother-in-law. We strongly feel that one of our greatest benefit that we have had in their coming back, to India for good, is the closeness that we could develop with our grandchildren that once a year visits could never fill and, considering the life in US, we would be relegated to the status (in their minds) of one of their old ancestors of the past that could soon be forgotten.
My mother (son’s grandmother) is fiercely independent and she has chosen to live at her own at her place in Kerala even at her advanced age. We have often talked to her of moving in with us. She always used to quote a popular Mallu saying that loosely translated would mean “There’s nothing like reading from the same Ramayana text at your own home”. But we are aware that this can’t go for long and while thanking God for His blessings, we are planning out things so that she will have someone at her side soon enough.
Dear Shahji, as I read your comments I felt as if you picked up from where I left and completed the newsletter. Brilliant!! Thank you.
I grew up with grandparents who were like my parents. They instilled values. And as you said grandparents stepped in when my son was around. I was lucky. I hope I can support my son when I become a grandparent.
I grew up with grandparents who were like my parents. They instilled values. And as you said grandparents stepped in when my son was around. I was lucky. I hope I can support my son when I become a grandparent.
You are a teacher and will make a great grandmother
Really enjoyable