Filter Coffee #120

On Loyalty

Many readers, including teachers & parents, commented on FC #119. 

• Nisha, a teacher, says: “This topic certainly strikes a chord with me as a teacher. One of the challenges is to find a deep connection with high school students post-pandemic, as there are many defensive barriers in place now. Teachers have to remember that they are the adults in the students' lives, and bending over backward to build a connection through compromising on standards of behaviour is not equal to caring.”

• SG Murali, a grandparent, says: “Our generation perhaps is the only generation which listened to both parents and children. Maybe we should add our teachers also to this list. Also in a joint family, many cousins lived together, but there was no compartmentalization. The seamlessness helped us a lot. With nuclear family and instant gratification, my worry is that children are getting spoiled. Digital detox is an absolute must for them.”

• Swathi, another teacher, says: “Loved it. A topic certainly close to my heart! Children are so fragile these days, and parents and schools seem to only protect this. Will children be able to handle failure at a later stage when they are adults? I certainly hope they can. Thank you for saying that it’s the parent’s responsibility to inculcate manners and etiquette, some parents these days think it’s the school’s job to do so :) The culture has certainly changed and while I see a generation that is becoming increasingly disrespectful, I also see one that is confident, unafraid to speak up, and very clear with what they want!”

• A parent, Murali Neelakantan, says: “You continue to surprise me with your Sunday specials. I particularly enjoyed this one. As you observed, learning wasn’t fun for us. The teacher taught, and it was not his/her problem whether the students learned. Now the school is a learning environment. It's not just semantics, it’s a huge difference. I often remark that I am enjoying school and learning like I never did, thanks to my son. I am not overwhelmed that I cannot teach him how to do his homework because this is not what I was taught in school. My approach is that we will learn together. That’s been so much fun, right from kindergarten, and it continues even now. If parents have this approach, learning will be fun for the whole family. This may seem too avant-garde, but it’s worked well for me. Besides, I am getting something out of the education that I am paying for 🙂”

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🎖 Loyalty

The other day, a friend of mine ruefully remarked, “There is no loyalty left in this world. My driver who was with me for 10 years and whose children I helped get educated has left my services because he is getting a few thousand more from someone else”. I asked him if he spoke to the driver to ascertain why he needed more money and whether he offered to match what he was about to get? His reply was, “Why should I? I am not interested in his problems or in buying his loyalty.” This made me wonder: Is not loyalty founded on some quid pro quo? Should the employer who enjoys the loyalty of an employee assume that loyalty does not deserve an award? Should he not attempt to retain a loyal employee? 

Being Loyal is about being of constant support or owing allegiance to a person or a good cause or an institution. Loyalty signifies a deep-rooted attachment or devotion. A loyal person would do anything that subserves the cause he espouses. Loyalty is a noun and loyal is an adjective but, as we all know, an adjective modifies a noun and so loyalty is the quality of being loyal — but both the terms are used interchangeably in relation to a person or a cause. Can it extend to pets? Can we say the dog is a loyal animal? Yes, of course, without any doubt. They are the man’s best friend. The only difference between a loyal person and a loyal pet is, to my mind, the possibility of a loyal person ceasing to be loyal but the dog remaining loyal all through. A sceptic may say that the perception of loyalty in a dog is actually the dog’s response to the care and attention that the owner lavishes on it, and that may not be the case with an employee who is expected to remain loyal without any recognition. If just the number of years of service gets him the loyalty tag, it would be unrealistic. 

I came across this quote:

“Animals are reliable, many full of love, true in their affections, predictable in their actions, grateful and loyal. Difficult standards for people to live up to.” – Alfred Armand Montapert (Author of The Supreme Philosophy Of Man: The Laws of Life).

Going back to the quid pro quo aspect of loyalty, one cannot but help agree that among humans, loyalty is not pristine and permanent. It is not about having someone enslaved through some kind of gratification. In a social context, a person may remain loyal for so long as he gets recognised for his loyalty. And if at any time he is insulted or his efforts are undermined, he may live in disenchantment, the antithesis of loyalty. The cynic might say that loyalty is actually need-based. A person will be loyal to another for so long as his needs are met. 

It follows, therefore, that loyalty is, in most cases, unconditional. You may appreciate this if you test the synonymity of loyal and faithful. To my mind, loyalty is more enduring than faithfulness and is at a higher plane. Faithfulness is about one’s conduct, but loyalty is a sentiment. If you compare loyal with faith you will see that faith is relatable to religion but loyal is commonly associated with a cause or a person. You can be loyal to your country, but you don’t see it as being faithful. As per Mark Twain:

Loyalty to the Nation all the time, loyalty to the Government when it deserves it.

If someone is disloyal, it may not be detected easily. However, if someone is being unfaithful it is detected eventually and the consequences can be rather serious. The effects of being disloyal are intangible compared to being unfaithful, which has tangible dimensions. That underscores the belief that loyalty is a sentiment and faithfulness is conduct.

Can fear be mistaken for loyalty? If a person serves a master and never questions his actions even if it shocks his conscience, is that person being loyal? The henchmen of a don fear for their lives, and their obedience is not to be mistaken for loyalty. Fear of punishment makes them perform acts of crime, and they do it not out of trust reposed in them or out of loyalty. Radical elements display fierce loyalty, which is usually an outcome of indoctrination. If the philosophy of the radical outfit is premised on religion, a person can be both loyal and faithful. His conduct is largely influenced by the blind sentiments that he imbibed from a radical leader whose notoriety is mistaken for fame. A case of indoctrinated loyalty.

“Loyalty to an unjust cause is a perversion of honor.” - Anonymous

Is there something called political loyalty? It is possible that a person who has embraced a political ideology will remain steadfast in his commitment and loyalty to the party. However, we have seen many instances of persons proclaiming loyalty to a political party for so long as they are being made an important functionary or are given a ticket to run for the election. Defection is the antithesis of loyalty in politics. Thus, being loyal to a political party is perhaps a good example of it being quid pro quo. 

Friendship is identified more with loyalty than with faithfulness. To have a friend who will stand by you in good and bad times is a boon. I have written about this in 🔗 Filter Coffee #026. Please browse through it.

Royalty may rhyme with loyalty, but there is no reason to pay any royalty to secure loyalty. A truly loyal person does not expect anything in return. It is a sentiment that he nourishes of his own volition, without expectation. If indeed loyalty is conditional upon getting something in return, it can only be considered as anything but loyalty.

Brand loyalty is another interesting aspect. It essentially is the tendency of some consumers to continue buying the same brand of goods rather than competing brands. But this kind of loyalty can be transient. If a competitor brings a better product at a competitive price, the loyalties may shift. So, the company which enjoys brand loyalty has to fiercely protect it as it is part of its consumer base. Brand loyalty will therefore require nurturing and investment. Robust advertisements can help attract customers, but it cannot foster loyalty unless the product proves itself to be the best in class. On the flip side, I have known people switching to products endorsed by their favourite celebrity, which means they are first loyal to the celebrity and not to the brand per se. In a way, both the celebrity and the fan club can become brand ambassadors.

Smokers, too, have brand loyalty, but the anti-smoking lobby calls it a suicidal obsession.

Discussion on loyalty is incomplete without talking about its nemesis, ‘betrayal’. Brutus is said to have betrayed Caesar. But many hold the view that Brutus had divided loyalty. Whilst he cared for Caesar, he was loyal to the people of Rome and was afraid that Caesar would become corrupt and not care for his subjects.

Another story of friendship, loyalty, and betrayal is The Kite Runner by Khalid Hosseini. It has also been made into a movie. I urge you to read more about the novel 🔗The Kite Runner. You can also watch the movie on 🔗Prime Video.

I read somewhere that loyal readers are like visitors. They keep visiting to see what’s new.

Take care & be safe. See you next week. Ciao.

Parting shot: “The hot dog is very loyal. It is the only one which feeds the hand that bites it.”